How to Eat Properly When Your Hotel Is a Ship
Anyone who plans trips around meals has a reasonable suspicion of cruising. The worries are understandable: sprawling buffets, set menus and only a few hours ashore in each place. But it turns out the question isn't whether you can eat well on a ship. It's whether the trip has been designed around people who care what ends up on the plate.
That's the thing worth looking at when you compare luxury cruises. At that level, food is often a major part of what you're paying for, from the number of restaurants on board to whether the chefs bring in local produce from the ports along the way. It isn't guaranteed, so you need to know which questions to ask.
Look at the kitchen, not just the menu
Ask how many dining venues there are, whether they're open seating and how the ship handles dietary needs. See whether the menus change by region, and whether there's anything beyond the usual international standards. Some lines run cooking classes or bring in regional specialities when they're in a particular part of the world, and some have a food host who leads shore trips. Not every ship does, so it's worth checking.
A good sign is a kitchen that's confident enough to keep things simple. A perfectly ripe tomato with decent olive oil and good bread beats an elaborate plate with too many ingredients. If the menus read like a list of techniques rather than a list of things that taste good, I'd be wary.
Pay attention to bread and coffee, too. They're small things, but they tell you how seriously a kitchen takes the basics. If the breakfast bread is fresh and the espresso is properly made, there's a decent chance the rest of the food will follow the same logic. If you're travelling with someone who isn't a fellow food obsessive, this is also a fairly painless way to check what you're getting before you commit.
Make each port day about one market
The Mediterranean's markets are the best shortcut to understanding a place. Valencia's Mercado Central is huge and full of locals doing their weekly shop. La Boqueria in Barcelona is more of a tourist magnet, so go the moment it opens and head for the counters at the back. Palma has the Mercat de l'Olivar in the city centre, and it's good for a quick browse and a snack standing up.
Timing is the real challenge. Lunch in Spain tends to start late, often well after two o'clock, while ships have fixed all-aboard times. The practical solution is to eat a light breakfast on board, hit the market early and have a snack at a bar mid-morning. Many places serve small plates and a glass of vermouth before lunch, and it's a perfectly civilised way to fit in a proper bite.
Not every small plate is a pintxo
It's worth getting the terminology right. In the Basque Country, pintxos are the small bites that sit on bar counters, often served on a slice of bread with a toothpick holding everything together. Tapas is a broader Spanish tradition, and the rules change from place to place. In some cities, such as Granada, a small plate arrives free with every drink, while in others you'll order and pay for everything separately.
So don't assume what worked in one town will work in the next. Watch what the locals do, copy them and ask if you're not sure. Most bartenders are happy to explain, especially if you've made the effort to say hello in Spanish.
Walk two streets away from the harbour
The restaurants closest to the quayside are usually the ones aimed at passing visitors. Walk a couple of streets inland and you'll find the places that depend on regular customers. Look for a handwritten menu, a crowd of locals and a menú del día, the set lunch that many Spanish restaurants offer on weekdays. It's usually good value, and it tells you what the kitchen does best.
Be cautious about menus with photographs, or anywhere with someone standing outside trying to persuade you in. Good restaurants rarely need to. If a place is empty at the hour when everyone else is eating, there's usually a reason.
If you're torn between two restaurants, pick the one with the shorter menu. A kitchen that does fewer things usually does them better, and you're more likely to eat something that tastes of where you are. It's the same rule I'd apply anywhere, and it works just as well in a harbour town as it does in a big city.
Pace yourself back on board
After a long lunch ashore, a lighter dinner on board is often the sensible choice. Take advantage of sea days to try a cooking class, a wine tasting or a quieter specialty restaurant. If you've got dietary requirements, tell the ship before you sail and then remind the maître d' on the first evening.
A ship gives you the chance to wake up somewhere new every morning without repacking. The best meals, though, still come down to curiosity and a bit of preparation. Do your homework on what each port is known for, leave a little slack in the plan and be willing to follow your nose. You might find the most memorable bite of the trip is a ten-minute snack at a counter, not a seven-course dinner on board.